Italics still quoting from the interview with
Karen Green widow of author David Wallace who committed suicide.
"I have these visual cues where it
all comes back to me, and if there is any way you can make that stop then you
will do. If it means bashing your head against the wall, or whatever. The fear
that you won't get out of it is worse than the thing itself. I think that is
where he was that afternoon.
"People don't understand how ill he was. It was a monster that just
ate him up. And at that point everything was secondary to the illness. Not just
writing. Everything else: food, love, shelter…"
Andrew said he
needed a rest. His disease wore him down. He wanted relief. He knew he was
loved and he had resources but the disease was truly a monster that ate him up.
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